that thing where i apparently type more than i thought i ever would

so, i got a new shiny thing.

Current Mood: vroom

I'm done.
Somebody stop this ride, I'd like to get off.

Current Music: Fiona Apple - Criminal

okay, wtf.
It's 2:30 am, on a worknight.
I thought my alarm was going off.
No, it's my phone ringing.
I thought it was 6:30 until I hung up the phone.

I've been sick for the last two and a half days.
Tonight's been the only one I've actually felt almost okay.
And now I'm not going to get any more sleep.
Pretty sure I was in the middle of a really good dream, too.
And now I'm wide awake again.
It took me forever to get to sleep the first time.
Argh.

Let's see if I can manage to resume dream now :(

Current Music: Repo! - Legal Assassin

11/12 3:30am

oh.
My.
GOD.

( Repo! )

Current Mood: energetic

11/9, 1:20am

argh, damnit.
Need a mulligan for this evening.
Most of the evening went pretty well, actually.
Even some laughter, which is a nice change of pace.
Still, couldn't have left much of an impression...
Ah well.
Maybe next time goes better.
:\

Current Mood: apprehensive

Indeed, today was awful.

What wonders lie in store tomorrow.
I'm so excited.
no, really.
no sarcasm at all.

Hrm.
4:50 am and I get a text message.
Looks important, so I have to call.
I don't want to call.
Every time I talk to her, my day goes to shit.
Even now, seven months later.

It's only 715am.
I don't want my day to go to shit.
I'm tired of all my days going to shit.

She wants to make amends.
She wants to be friends again.
I want to not be miserable the rest of my fucking life.
I'm not sure there's anywhere those coincide.

Today's going to go to shit.
"happy birthday."

I'm tired of putting on a happy face for the world every day.

low sugars.
10/08 - Thursday
5:00 am.

Five am and I'm awake.
I went to bed only five hours ago...
And I've bolted out of bed awake.
It's low sugar time.
I hate this feeling. It's awful.
Waking up with cold shakes.
Barely able to move myself, but up I get.
Put chocolate into the face, and now I wait for it to take effect.
I'd like to go back to sleep, but I have to get up in a minute.
(or an hour, or two)
I'm not sure if I'll be able to get back to sleep.
Or if I even should.
I'm so tired...

( Last night and other musings. )

Current Mood: cold

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck

this was NOT supposed to happen.
wtf am i supposed to do now?
ARGH.
FUCKING ARGH.

Current Mood: frustrated
Current Music: Abney Park - Dark and Twisty Road

08/30/2008 - Saturday

The Puyallup fair's coming up again soon.
September 5th - 21st.
I think I'll show up at least one day.
I *need* piroshkis!
piroshki piroshki piroshki piroshki

Current Mood: piroshki

updates
08/28/2008 - Thursday.

Home from playing Magic at 11ish.
Losing to your own play mistakes is disheartening :(

( didn't realize i had this much to say )

Current Mood: melancholy

08/20/2008 - Wednesday

2am and I just finished up my book.
I'm not even remotely tired ... still have work tomorrow.
Should be fun. :(

I was in a pretty decent mood today.
Things going okay, for the most part.
Still haven't heard back about the job ...
I don't think I'm even going to get an interview :(
Traffic on the run was unamusing.
Multiple accidents .. oh. boy.
Then she called. About car shit.
Which turned my mood right to foul.

So. Yes. Job is looking doubtful :(
Or sleep, at this point.
Sheesh...

Current Mood: wishing i was sleepy

08/17/2008 - Sunday

Yesterday was the best day I've had in *months*.
I should do the run on Friday more often.
I've not had two days off in a VERY long time...
wheeee.

Is it weird to come up with the *ending* to a story,
then decide you want to make a book/novel/short story to fit it?

Never before have I had the uncontrollable urge to punch a fictional character in the face.

Seriously though, I'm rather enjoying this book series.
(Earth's Children series by Jean Auel)
But I feel like I was shat on for 300 pages for the last 15 to make up for it.
Ah well. I start book 4 tomorrow.
Probably finish by the weekend...
Then it's onto book 5.

I'm going to need more books.

08/03/2008 - Sunday.

4am.
Not even remotely tired.
Drinking that sobe thing at 9pm, bad idea.
I didn't think I'd be remotely awake at this hour.
Everyone else has been asleep for at least 2 hours.
I got productive.
Laundry is done for the first time in months.
It's even folded!
No more laundry pile ...
Changed the bedcoverings.
Cleaned up all the trash.
Cleaned off my desk.
Arranged the closet.
I'm out of things to do in here...
And I'm still so very much awake.
Watched everything off BOTH tivos.
Watched all three movies I downloaded.

I have got to get back on a normal sleep schedule.

Current Mood: awake

07/29/2008 - Tuesday.

I'm an idiot.
I'm a complete fucking idiot.
The definition of insanity:
You keep doing the same thing, thinking the results will be different.

I can't keep doing this.
Something has got to change...

Current Mood: enraged

I told her.

Current Mood: complacent

Advertisement